Living well with phobias

Start with the brochures, videos, apps or online courses listed on the phobias page. It can really help if you understand how phobias develop, to find out that you’re not alone, and to learn the techniques that other people have used to recover from or manage their phobia better. This helps you to take charge of your fear, rather than your fear being in charge of you.

Apps reviewed by Healthify

You may find it useful to look at some anxiety management apps.

Learning how to breathe deeply can reduce anxiety and feelings of panic when you encounter situations that trigger your phobia. Find out more about panic disorder and how to manage a panic attack. 

Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of each moment of your day as it happens. Becoming more mindful helps reduce tension, stress and anxiety. It also helps you notice what supports your wellbeing. Learn a mindfulness practice.

Although there is a lot you can do to support yourself, it’s also OK to ask for help. Talking therapy can help a lot, and if you need to you can also get medicines that may help. Find a counsellor or therapist(external link) and talk to your healthcare provider about whether medication would help you.

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Joining a support group in your area is a good way to learn ideas from other people about managing phobias, as well as feeling as though someone else understands what you are experiencing. Ask your healthcare provider, phone Healthline 0800 611 116 or Anxiety NZ 0800 ANXIETY (0800 269 4389) to see if there is a support group in your area. If you can’t go out to a group, have a look for online forums and find one that works for you.

If you feel you can confront the phobia, the best strategy is to face the object or situation in small doses as often as possible. It’s very empowering to learn that you can feel the fear and do it anyway!

Facing the object or situation repeatedly works to reduce your anxiety through a process of habituation – your body gets used to being in the situation without a threat happening and your anxiety naturally decreases over time. Also, it’s a good opportunity to prove your fears wrong and see that the consequences you're anxious about are generally very unlikely to happen.

If you've recovered from a phobia, it’s a good idea to keep practicing being in a situation you used to fear. For example, if you know you're quite anxious about meeting new people, don’t avoid doing this. If you take every opportunity to meet new people, your confidence will grow.

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Tell your whānau and friends what you're experiencing. Help them to understand that telling you to just relax or ignore your fears won’t help. Tell them instead that what you need is their support and encouragement for you to slowly understand and face your anxiety, one small step at a time.

Having a phobia probably doesn’t affect every aspect of your life, so make sure you keep up the activities and interests that aren’t affected by it. This improves your quality of life and can give you skills to help you deal with a phobia.

Alcohol, caffeine and other drugs are not useful ways of relaxing to overcome phobias. You will probably feel more anxious afterwards and you risk becoming addicted. Read more about caffeine and alcohol and mental health. 

We now know that exercise benefits your mind as well as your body. Researchers have found that regular exercise can help you to manage anxiety, including panic disorder and phobias.

Find out more about physical activity and mental health and the general benefits of being active. 

Nature is key to unlocking your wellbeing. Researchers have found that spending time in nature improves your physical and mental wellbeing. Find out some ideas for how to let nature in to strengthen your wellbeing. 

Image credit: Healthify He Puna Waiora

Eating to ensure you have good nutrition gives you sustained energy to help you to manage your anxiety. Learn more about healthy eating basics.

There is also some evidence that specific foods can help to reduce anxiety. It can help to include the following foods as part of your healthy diet:

• Foods containing magnesium (leafy greens, legumes, nuts, seeds and whole grains).
• Foods containing zinc (oysters, liver, beef, cashews, eggs).
• Foods containing omega-3 fatty acid (fatty fish, such as salmon, tuna, sardines).
• Probiotic foods (sauerkraut, kefir).
• Foods rich in B vitamins (wholegrains, almonds, avocado).

Do check that you're not allergic to any of the foods listed here. 

Sleep is the most important form of relaxation so try to keep up a regular sleep routine. Read more about sleep on our sleep tips page and Te Kete Haerenga and sleep which includes sleep tips and a worksheet to help you improve your sleep hygiene (good sleep behaviours).  

Connecting with something that has greater meaning can be a useful support when you're managing any mental health issue, including phobias.

This could be through:

• religion or spirituality (wairua)
• connecting with your culture or whakapapa
• a creative project
• volunteering or helping others in need.

Read more about things you can do to support your wairua.

This can distract you from your own problems for a while and build resilience to manage phobias when they affect you.