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1. Reconnect with whānau and friends
Reply to an email, ring someone for a chat or arrange to meet up for a coffee. If you have problems getting around, ask them to pop in and visit – as long as you and they are feeling well. If you can't get out as much as you used to, or you're isolating, technology can be a big help. Try texting or having a video chat with friends and loved ones, and keep it up regularly.
2. Take small steps to be around other people
Go to a café or the shops and smile and make small talk with the cashier, other customers and so on. Wave or smile at your neighbours, and offer to share some cuttings or excess produce from your garden. Chances are, you'll strike up a conversation and get to know one another.
3. Join a club or group
Get involved in something that interests you – a book club, a craft group, a walking group or an exercise class like aqua fitness. If you have always wanted to travel, there are plenty of groups that cater for older clients so get in touch with your local travel agent to discover some exciting options. Another way to meet new people is by volunteering your time to a cause or charity you support. Many parts of Aotearoa New Zealand have an active Neighbourly group enabling you to meet the people living around you in a safe and secure way. Doing something you enjoy with other people who also enjoy it is a good way of meeting people with common interests. Hopefully some of them will become friends.
4. Move through the awkwardness
It may feel awkward at first to chat to people you already know but have lost touch with, as well as with new people you meet. If so, brush up on some easy conversation starters(external link) to help you find things to chat about. You may also want to try socialising in smaller groups. A coffee date with one person might feel easier than a large club meeting.
5. Find activities in your community
Check out resources and programmes at your local i-SITE information centre(external link), Age Concern(external link), library, community centre, café or Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB).(external link) You can also browse through your local community newspapers to see what activities are happening near you. Older adults can use their SuperGold card(external link) to travel at many times of the day.
6. Keep learning
Enrol in an online or in-person course, learn te reo or another new language, or attend a talk or seminar in your community. FutureLearn(external link) have hundreds of free online courses and even some with a New Zealand focus.(external link)
7. Be patient and keep trying
It can take several conversations before you make a new friend. Don’t give up – the rewards will be worth it.
8. Reach out for support
If you can't go far, or are in need of a friend, Age Concern (external link)runs an accredited visitor service providing regular visits to older Auckland-based people who would like more company, to reduce social isolation and loneliness. St John runs a caring caller service(external link) where volunteers call people to check on them and provide a bit of conversation.
